Letters to Heal the Self #002 - D Niya

After a year. Did my first meditation today. Inner critic meditation. My experience:

I am the director of my life. Saw my inner critic directing my movie. A movie about my life. She looked at me confidently and said this is how ur experiences has made you. This is how the movie is gonna be. I say cut and own my director seat. Thats my seat. I’m not going to make my movie showing how my life has made me feel less of a person cause thats not true. I’m powerful and strong. I have everything today cause my experiences built my strengths. Helping to fade off the insecurities and uncertainties i had. This movie must be a message showing how im worthy and strong, inspiring people and growing myself while growing people around me too.

It was a powerful message. But yet i still feel a sense of being stuck. Not being able to break habits (smoking / alcohol). Started reading on ancestral healing.

But its frustrating. Even when i am mentally feeding myself with knowledge and understanding. Why am i not breaking patterns?


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